Author Archives: Dr. Robert Neimeyer

Lost my husband to lung cancer

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I recently lost my husband to lung cancer. The chemotherapy was not working and they were debating whether another form of treatment would work. He then got an infection and was admitted to hospital. He never left the hospital as he got sepsis.  I feel responsible as I was his caregiver 24/7

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Anticipatory Grief — An Ask Dr. Neimeyer Guest Column

Editor’s Note: This week we are printing a response to a recent Q&A on Anticipatory grief.   The author, Mary Jane Hurley Brant, M.S., CGP has written for AfterTalk several times in the past, and we value her thoughts. Below is “Judy’s” question and Dr. Neimeyer’s answer followed by Ms. Mary Jane Hurley Brant’s response.   Dear

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Deadly car accident takes two daughters

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I was recently in a deadly car accident that took the lives of my two beautiful, funny, and loving baby girls, ages 6 and 8. The accident also resulted in my surviving teenage year old daughter being a paraplegic, and my husband having a TBI, and several fractures in his face, arm, leg

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Anticipatory grief, when a loved one is dying

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My question is about anticipatory grief, the distress that family members can feel when a loved one is receiving end-of-life care. I work in a palliative care unit of a large hospital, and we often have families who are overwhelmed with the reality of the patient’s impending death, to a point that

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Feeling conflicted about remarrying

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My husband passed away a few years ago when my children were very young. I was fortunate enough to find a wonderful man and remarry. He has embraced ‘our’ children as if they were his own. My problem is that I am very conflicted. I want my children to grow up knowing

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Getting through grief without anti-depressants?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Is the best and probably only way to get through complicated grief through the use of anti-depressants? Thanks. Demi   Dear Demi, Both clinical experience and clinical research suggest that antidepressant medication is a mixed blessing in the context of bereavement, for several reasons. In fact, for many years psychiatrists agreed that

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