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Mom has turned bedroom into a shrine to my departed father… – copy

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | August 10, 2020 | 1 Comment

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My question is regarding my mother.   We lost my father very unexpectedly this past summer, and she is having a very hard time with his loss, as we all are.  My question is this: Is it good for her to have her bedroom looking like a shrine to him, so that whenever …

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Mother died in car accident while son was driving

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | August 3, 2020 | 1 Comment

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Thirteen years ago I experienced a seizure while driving.  My mother was killed in the accident.  I had an extremely close relationship with my mother.  I continue to feel guilty and struggle to make sense of this tragedy. Phil Dear Phil, Your tragic story, summarized vividly in so few words, conveys the catastrophic …

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Advice for a daughter who lost her husband: 7/27/20

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 27, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My 23 year old daughter lost her husband two years ago. He was a soldier and her high school sweetheart. He was killed in a car accident on a military base. She is so lost and devastated. She feels like she has lost her identity and has questioned everything in life now. …

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Spouses grieving loss of a daughter differently

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 20, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dr. Neimeyer, My daughter passed away four years ago. My husband and I grieve so differently. I find it difficult to feel supported by him because I have always needed to talk about my grief while he rarely talks about his. When I cry, he doesn’t know what to say and doesn’t really offer the …

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Preparing for the anniversary of my daughter’s passing

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 7, 2020 | 1 Comment

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, How do I handle the one year anniversary of my daughter’s passing, which is coming up next month? She left three babies behind, and I found her in her room with the boys with her. Luckily they were sleeping. But I can’t get that vision out of my head! I cry, I …

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My Daughter Took Her Own Life – Gay Pride Month

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 29, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My only child, my 16 year old daughter, took her own life just one month ago.  She showed no signs at all.  Straight A student, worked as cashier part time, saving money for college.  She just finished her College Boards and got an amazing score.  I know this wasn’t planned–she had placed orders …

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I found my dad’s body on Father’s Day

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 22, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dear. Dr. Neimeyer, Do you think that because I  found my dad’s body a few hours after a normal visit that could be a reason I’m having such a difficult time now with his death? Today is five months and I can’t stop crying. I lost my dad on Father’s Day and it was so unexpected. …

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Unpredictability of Grief: a Letter to Sofia

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 15, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’m a writer for my high school’s award-winning newspaper and I’m writing an article about the unpredictability of grief. I would love if you could answer some of my questions regarding the subject, because a lot of the students at are school have lost people recently. Here are my questions   Sofia …

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Coping with multiple losses

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 8, 2020 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Why is it so hard? I lost my sister in the spring of 2013, then my husband a month later, then my son two months later 2013. It’s been a losing battle I just don’t know how to handle this. Paulette Dear Paulette, When a person has a litany of losses in …

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The Grief Journey

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 1, 2020 | 0 Comments

[Editors Note: I was reminded of this Q&A when three members of a family died in my community from COVID-19, a mother, father, and daughter. Many are facing multiple familial losses now, and it is likely to get worse.] Dear Dr. Neimeyer, The grief journey never goes away. I lost my dad when I was …

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