loss of a wife

Grieving and Sleep Problems

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’m in my late 60’s, and for most of my life have slept pretty well and had plenty of energy to tackle the day.  But since my wife died 14 months ago, I’ve had a real problem sleeping.  I get tired but lay awake with my mind churning, and usually watch TV […]

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Inconsolable Grieving for my Wife

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My wife of almost 35 years died suddenly four weeks ago. Yes she was ill for many years but I took care of her full time including doing her dialysis  at home, running her feeding tube every night and doing everything in the house as she was unable to do those things do

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A Wife’s Suicide

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My wife took her own life a few months ago, and it has busted me wide open. I’m better than where I was but far from being better. I wrestle with the coulda, shoulda, woulda of survivor guilt and anger. I miss her terribly, and now have somewhat come to terms that this

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Confronting my grief x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’ve been reading your column for some time now, and trying to follow your advice about confronting rather than avoiding my grief through writing on AfterTalk to my dear wife, Dorothy, who meant the world to me before her death two months ago.  We did just about everything together for decades, and

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Widower in search of…x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I am a widower (although I don’t like this moniker) after more than 30 years of marriage. I don’t understand why “widowers” are not in the highest demand. We have proven our capacity for commitment, as well as have tons of experience in child rearing, relationships, and the refinement of how to

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I lost my young wife x

I lost my young wife after twenty years of marriage. Since then I feel like I’ve moved on; I found a new wife whom I love completely. We’ve raised terrific children. My problem is that I have an irrational fear of loss. At least once a day I obsess about losing my new wife, our

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A Widower’s question: Dwelling on the past… x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’ve been following some of the advice given in your column in the 3 months since my wife, Linda, died, and although my life will never be the same, I can see that I am improving.  I was a real mess for a while, but now I’m able to work and concentrate

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