grief and guilt

Feeling conflicted about remarrying

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My husband passed away a few years ago when my children were very young. I was fortunate enough to find a wonderful man and remarry. He has embraced ‘our’ children as if they were his own. My problem is that I am very conflicted. I want my children to grow up knowing […]

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Mother died in car accident while son was driving

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Thirteen years ago I experienced a seizure while driving.  My mother was killed in the accident.  I had an extremely close relationship with my mother.  I continue to feel guilty and struggle to make sense of this tragedy. Phil Dear Phil, Your tragic story, summarized vividly in so few words, conveys the catastrophic

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“I Lost My Mother…”

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I lost my mother to a terminal disease last year–a horrible disease, and she was in a horrible shape when she passed. The stress of caring for her got to me sometimes, and although I gave her everything she needed, sometimes it was not done with a loving heart. So I have

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Parting with a loved one’s belongings x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My wife passed away two years ago. We were both in our middle 60s. I want to resume dating, but female friends tell me I need to remove all traces of my wife from the apartment before I do so. I have not been able to part with anything since she died.

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Blaming Myself for My Mother’s Death

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, How do I stop blaming myself for my mother’s death?  She was 85 and 18 hours away from heart valve replacement, doing well, ready for it.  She was told to walk some before surgery, and her last walk was fatal.  I think I could have stopped her from overdoing it, but I

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