death of a spouse

Am I going to lose control?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer,I lost my husband 13 months ago. I have cried some. But I always feel like I have to be strong. I’ve been told by several people I haven’t given it enough time yet. I’m afraid one day I’m just totally going to lose control. Any ideas to help me? Judith   Dear […]

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Grieving for a Husband/Father During Holiday Season

Grieving for a Husband/Father During the Holidays Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband Don died 9 months ago after a rapid decline; and his lungs basically stopped working, even with oxygen treatments.  His death has been hard for us as a family in many ways, as he lived only about 6 months after getting the diagnosis, and

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Why is it so hard? Coping with multiple losses.

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Why is it so hard? I lost my sister in the spring, then my husband a month later, then my son two months later. It’s been a losing battle I just don’t know how to handle this. Paulina Dear Paulina, When a person has a litany of losses in such close succession

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Daughter lost her husband in an accident

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My 23 year old daughter lost her husband two years ago. He was a soldier and her high school sweetheart. He was killed in a car accident on a military base. She is so lost and devastated. She feels like she has lost her identity and has questioned everything in life now.

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“My Husband Died Unexpectedly…”

Hi Dr. Neimeyer, My husband died unexpectedly five years ago at the age of 54. We were together for 33 years. He dropped dead in front of me with no warning. They said that he was gone before he hit the floor. We had a very good marriage and I am thankful for the time

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Why do I want to live? x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My wife of over fifty years died a little over a year ago from a stroke. I have talked with my pastor, a psychologist, my family and friends and it seems nothing helps me.  I was her caregiver for about eight years, which given the opportunity I would do it all again. I

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I lost my young wife x

I lost my young wife after twenty years of marriage. Since then I feel like I’ve moved on; I found a new wife whom I love completely. We’ve raised terrific children. My problem is that I have an irrational fear of loss. At least once a day I obsess about losing my new wife, our

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A Widower’s question: Dwelling on the past… x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’ve been following some of the advice given in your column in the 3 months since my wife, Linda, died, and although my life will never be the same, I can see that I am improving.  I was a real mess for a while, but now I’m able to work and concentrate

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I am in agony x

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My wife Angela passed away very recently. It was just us. No children. I am in agony. 24/7. Going to work means nothing. A waste of time. There is no meaning since we lived only for each other. I wish God would take me now. My heart grows weaker each day. I’m

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