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Building a new future: Ask Dr. Neimeyer

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 17, 2023 | 1 Comment

Hi Dr. Neimeyer, My husband died unexpectedly five years ago at the age of 54. We were together for 33 years. He dropped dead in front of me with no warning. They said that he was gone before he hit the floor. We had a very good marriage and I am thankful for the time […]

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Mother died while son was driving

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 10, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Thirteen years ago I experienced a seizure while driving.  My mother was killed in the accident.  I had an extremely close relationship with my mother.  I continue to feel guilty and struggle to make sense of this tragedy. Phil Dear Phil, Your tragic story, summarized vividly in so few words, conveys the catastrophic […]

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My Gay Daughter Took Her Own Life – Gay Pride Month

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | July 3, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My only child, my 16 year old daughter, took her own life just one month ago.  She showed no signs at all.  Straight A student, worked as cashier part time, saving money for college.  She just finished her College Boards and got an amazing score.  I know this wasn’t planned–she had placed orders […]

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My husband’s daughter accused him of molesting her

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 26, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband passed away suddenly and unexpectedly over two years ago. I am in a lot of emotional pain, but that’s not why I am writing. Three decades ago my husband’s daughter accused him of molesting her; this recollection had come to her, she said, during a course of psychotherapy. He said […]

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Mom has turned bedroom into a shrine to my departed father…

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 19, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My question is regarding my mother.   We lost my father very unexpectedly this past summer, and she is having a very hard time with his loss, as we all are.  My question is this: Is it good for her to have her bedroom looking like a shrine to him, so that whenever […]

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I found my dad’s body on Father’s Day

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 12, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dear. Dr. Neimeyer, Do you think that because I  found my dad’s body a few hours after a normal visit that could be a reason I’m having such a difficult time now with his death? Today is five months and I can’t stop crying. I lost my dad on Father’s Day and it was so unexpected. […]

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Feeling conflicted about remarrying

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | June 5, 2023 | 1 Comment

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My husband passed away a few years ago when my children were very young. I was fortunate enough to find a wonderful man and remarry. He has embraced ‘our’ children as if they were his own. My problem is that I am very conflicted. I want my children to grow up knowing […]

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The Unpredictability of Grief: a Letter to Sofia

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | May 29, 2023 | 0 Comments

[Editors Note: I just heard about two fathers who died this week, both in their thirties. We reprint this for all the young people losing loved ones] Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I’m a writer for my high school’s award-winning newspaper and I’m writing an article about the unpredictability of grief. I would love if you could […]

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Recent Comments on an Ask Dr. Neimeyer Q&A about the sudden loss of a husband

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | May 22, 2023 | 0 Comments

  Editor’s Note: the following comments come from two Ask Dr. Neimeyer Q&As: After sudden death of a husband; finding meaning in life My Husband Died: How can I live without him?   LT: I wish I could help everyone because that is my nature. But I am feeling the same after losing my husband […]

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Spouses grieving loss of a daughter differently

By Dr. Robert Neimeyer | May 15, 2023 | 0 Comments

Dr. Neimeyer, My daughter passed away four years ago. My husband and I grieve so differently. I find it difficult to feel supported by him because I have always needed to talk about my grief while he rarely talks about his. When I cry, he doesn’t know what to say and doesn’t really offer the […]

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