Recent Stories
Editor’s note: this is a re-publication of a question to Dr. Neimeyer from longtime AfterTalk columnist Caitlin Dorman. Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I assumed I would always know what my dad would say if he were here today. We were best friends, and he was very, very outspoken. Without blinking, I feel in sync with his […]
Continue ReadingDear Dr. Neimeyer, Ten years ago my beloved cat, Cloe passed away. She was sick cat and not supposed to live one year. She lived fifteen. Cloe was my constant companion. Whenever I was ill, she lay by my side. When pregnant and on bed rest for months, she was my best friend and confidant, […]
Continue ReadingDear Dr. Neimeyer, How do I stop blaming myself for my mother’s death? She was 85 and 18 hours away from heart valve replacement, doing well, ready for it. She was told to walk some before surgery, and her last walk was fatal. I think I could have stopped her from overdoing it, but I […]
Continue ReadingDear Dr. Neimeyer, As a counselor myself, I was interested to read recently that the majority of people who experience a significant loss react with a surprising degree of resilience, to the extent that the grief process can, in the longer term, be a positive experience for them. This tends to counter a prevailing, if […]
Continue ReadingI am a bereavement counselor at a hospice. I have a client who has done amazing work after the death of her husband. She is in her mid 60’s and very healthy. She and her husband had counseling before his death and she continued after his death. She has written, and written, and read everything […]
Continue ReadingI am a hospice social worker with a large bereavement center that offers community support services for grieving people of all kinds, not only surviving family members after a loved one dies in our home care or residential facility. But recently we’ve been stretched thin in our outreach and response services, and are trying to […]
Continue ReadingIn my practice I have encountered some clients who have experienced a significant loss in the past (e.g., loss of a parent when they were teenagers), which obviously altered their world views. They made sense of their losses by coming to the conclusion that bad things can happen randomly in this world, while at the […]
Continue ReadingI am a therapist who is seeing a woman who lives alone and without children, for complicated grief, and one of the people for whom she is grieving is her husband. They were married 4 years before he died 19 years ago, Every year on their anniversary, she has a very complicated ritual […]
Continue ReadingDear Dr. Neimeyer, How do I handle the one year anniversary of my daughter’s passing, which is coming up next month? She left 3 babies behind, and I found her in her room with the boys with her. Luckily they were sleeping. But I can’t get that vision out of my head! I cry, I […]
Continue ReadingDear Dr. Neimeyer, My 18 year old son hung himself in a tree on June 24, 2016. Since that day my life is full of guilt and heartache. I’ve seen multiple counselors and many of them have been great and they all tell me the same thing: it’s not my fault. But, I cannot forgive […]
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