Category Archives: Loss of a husband

Lost my Husband and my Dad…

Dear Dr, Neimeyer, It’s been around two years now since I lost my husband and my dad a few weeks apart. The grief is still so debilitating I can hardly get up in the morning. I see a therapist but it doesn’t feel like it’s helping very much. I attempted to take my life earlier

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Mourning a Former Spouse: Disenfranchised Grief

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My ex-husband and I were married for 25 years, together 28. We raised four children together. He was charming, sociable, affectionate, intelligent and silly. We enjoyed numerous good times. Toward the end, however, he became abusive and I made excuses to stay. After he took out his anger on one of the

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Widow asks about children and remarriage

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My husband passed away a few years ago when my children were very young. I was fortunate enough to find a wonderful man and remarry. He has embraced ‘our’ children as if they were his own. My problem is that I am very conflicted. I want my children to grow up knowing

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Grieving for a Husband/Father During Holiday Season

Grieving for a Husband/Father During the Holidays Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband Don died 9 months ago after a rapid decline; and his lungs basically stopped working, even with oxygen treatments.  His death has been hard for us as a family in many ways, as he lived only about 6 months after getting the diagnosis, and

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Grieving and the Holiday Season

Dear Dr. Neimeyer– My husband died just over a year ago, so on January 1st I will start my second year without him, and I am not looking forward to it.  It’s not that I am immobilized by grief, as I have gotten better across the months in that department, and actually feel pretty good

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Why is it so hard? Coping with multiple losses.

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Why is it so hard? I lost my sister in the spring, then my husband a month later, then my son two months later. It’s been a losing battle I just don’t know how to handle this. Paulina Dear Paulina, When a person has a litany of losses in such close succession

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My Husband Died: How can I live without him?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband died in November. He was in his early 40s. We were together nearly 25 years; he was my other half. We did everything together. It is so hard for me. All I do is cry. I know that’s not going to bring him back but I’m so heartbroken. It is

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A Bereavement Counselor’s dilemma: the widow is ready: nobody else is.

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I am a bereavement counselor at a hospice.  I have a client who has done amazing work after the death of her husband.  She is in her mid 60’s and very healthy.  She and her husband had counseling before his death and she continued after his death.  She has written, and written,

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My husband’s sudden death

Hi Dr. Neimeyer, My husband’s sudden death happened unexpectedly five years ago at the age of 54. We were together for 33 years. He dropped dead in front of me with no warning. They said that he was gone before he hit the floor. We had a very good marriage and I am thankful for

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“…my husband’s daughter accused him of molesting her…”

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband passed away suddenly and unexpectedly over two years ago. I am in a lot of emotional pain, but that’s not why I am writing. Three decades ago my husband’s daughter accused him of molesting her; this recollection had come to her, she said, during a course of psychotherapy. He said

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