Category Archives: Loss of a husband

After sudden death of a husband; finding meaning in life

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, Six months ago my partner of 47 years died suddenly. We have no children and have always been very close and spent a lot of time together. This would have been our first real year of retirement together and we were looking forward to growing old together, just enjoying our free time and everyday things.  Now he’s gone I can

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Husband’s Suicide: How do I move on?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband of over 30 years killed himself over two years ago. I went through survival mode the first year, and now have my life “working” in a sense, but still ruminate too much about “why,” and what I could have done to change it. I want peace, to accept that this

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Suicide thinking: I want to be dead

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My attention was recently drawn to your website, and especially this section of it, and I now have a great desire to ask for your help. My beloved husband wanted to die at home.  We had been married for over 50 years, and he had suffered with lung cancer and eventually dementia for

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Guilt and Grief — a Husband’s Long Decline

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I am married to a man more than a dozen years older than I am, and through most of our four decades together he has been the strong one who has taken care of most things.  Over the last decade he has had many surgeries.  He has many different things wrong, but

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Lost my Husband and my Dad…

Dear Dr, Neimeyer, It’s been around two years now since I lost my husband and my dad a few weeks apart. The grief is still so debilitating I can hardly get up in the morning. I see a therapist but it doesn’t feel like it’s helping very much. I attempted to take my life earlier

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Mourning a Former Spouse: Disenfranchised Grief

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My ex-husband and I were married for 25 years, together 28. We raised four children together. He was charming, sociable, affectionate, intelligent and silly. We enjoyed numerous good times. Toward the end, however, he became abusive and I made excuses to stay. After he took out his anger on one of the

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Widow asks about children and remarriage

Dear Dr Neimeyer, My husband passed away a few years ago when my children were very young. I was fortunate enough to find a wonderful man and remarry. He has embraced ‘our’ children as if they were his own. My problem is that I am very conflicted. I want my children to grow up knowing

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