Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Guilt and a Mother’s Passing

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I didn’t want to post this because I don’t want my loved ones to know the guilt I feel about my mother’s passing. But before my mom passed last year I avoided her calls as my sister said she was drinking a lot. We lived in different states. And she was drunk

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Tragic Death of a Loved One–finding meaning

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I have read and heard you speak about the need to revisit and retell the story of the tragic death of a loved one in order to find meaning in the event.  What stands out in your comments is obvious, but should be underlined, in my view:   the profound Truth about the need

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


A new grief therapist asks if being empathic is a liability?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I am a new therapist who is just beginning to work with grieving people, but wonder if I’ve chosen the right career.  I’ve always known I was an empathic person, someone who could feel genuinely for others who were hurting, and this made me a good listener for friends when I was

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Complicated Grief: A therapist question about the loss of a client’s daughter, possible suicide

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I have been working intermittently for many years with a woman named Pam who was divorced when her adult children were adolescents, as a result of the father’s unpredictable and violent behavior and alcoholism. Likewise, two of her four children have had long histories of drug and alcohol use, despite her funding

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


I Lost My Son to Suicide…

[Editor: Today is World Suicide Prevention Day] Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I lost my oldest son nearly 8 years ago to suicide at the age of 24.  He shot himself in our home.  Friends and people from church were very kind to us after it happened.  We have three other sons.  They are all grown now, but one

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


I lost my daughter…

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, I lost my  daughter, a 12-year-old, Melissa three weeks ago today. Earlier this summer she was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disorder but was in good health—at least we thought. But when she got her first treatment, within a week she was in the CVICU and then we had to make the

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Husband’s Suicide: How do I move on?

Dear Dr. Neimeyer, My husband of over 30 years killed himself over two years ago. I went through survival mode the first year, and now have my life “working” in a sense, but still ruminate too much about “why,” and what I could have done to change it. I want peace, to accept that this

Continue reading

Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts


Send Comfort, Flowers and Gifts